I had to talk myself out of a panic attack last night. As soon as my head hit the pillow last night, I felt reality hit… and it hit hard. We all know this is such a crazy time, filled with SO many uncertainties and unknowns. The scariest part is there seems to be no end in sight. Struggling with anxiety and depression, that combo is the “perfect storm”. Not being able to control what’s coming or know what’s next; stuff weighs heavily and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t scared of the dark places this could lead to. Upping my meds has helped but two other things that have been helping me tremendously in this first week has been perspective and routine.
Perspective helped calm me down last night. Reminding yourself of the positives can be SO hard but, it can be such a game-changer. I focused on how I should be thankful that I’m at home and safe, I can spend more time with my family (even if they drive me crazy), life is slowing down a bit, and I’m able to still work. If you can’t change the circumstances, change your perspective, right?
Routine is what really has been saving me though. Choosing to continue training was truly the best decision I could make. It provides structure, keeps me motivated (even though I totally lacked yesterday), gives me something to look forward to, and most importantly – it is the best thing for my mental health right now. A killer strength session early this morning was the best thing for my heart and mind after last night. Running has helped keep me afloat during so many hard times, now so more than ever.
If you are struggling, I feel ya. And if you feel your mental illness really starting to bite, you are most definitely not alone. I know I’m stating the obvious but sometimes hearing that can help. Sending positive vibes and love to everyone, especially those who aren’t home, still out there doing their jobs, and helping others – you guys are the true heroes!
Honestly, all we can do right now is to do what’s best for us and our families and that is going to look different for everyone. Keep supporting each other, reach out, share your struggles, take it day by day, BE COMPASSIONATE, and (try to) embrace the slow down. We’re all in this together more than ever.